Having a Bad Day?

February 22nd, 2010
By

Having a bad day? Whaaat? No can! It's only Monday! But seriously, if you eez, then here are some funnies to help bring a smile to your face. Enjoy!

Feeling unappreciated? World got you down?

Worker dead at desk for five days
Worker dead at desk for five days

Things Got Ya Down? Well Then, Consider These ...

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11AM, regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the super natural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11AM Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11AM, all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00, the part-time Sunday sweeper entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Still Having a Bad Day?

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day?

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What? STILL having a Bad Day?

An Iraqi terrorist didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb; he opened it and was blown to bits. God is Good!

There now, Feeling Better? I know I am, LOL***

There. Did that help to turn that frown upside-down? I hope so. Have a great week y'all!

Talk to me!
* Which story above made you laugh the most?
* Got any other funnies to add?
* You liking the Olympics so far? Almost pau! What has been your fave moment so far?
* With the holiday last week Monday and this today, how much are you missing our "Photography at the Right Angle" caption contests? :P What? Not much? Too bad, they're makin' a comeback next week! ;)

27 Responses to “Having a Bad Day?”

  1. Coconut Willy:

    I'm off today so can't possibly have a bad day. Right?

    I liked the seals and the dead guy at his desk the best.

    Happy Monday Y'all!


  2. Ynaku:

    Bwahahahahahah :) :P :D :lol:

    Tanx eh.


  3. frankie:

    Lawl at the terrorist one!


  4. che:

    Something similar the the "worker dead at desk" story happened at the office that I worked at years ago. About 3 or 4 months before I started a new job some of my co-workers told me that one of the partners who always worked late died in his offce overnight but they found him dead in his office the next morning.

    Favorite Olympic sport, curling.


  5. World Wide Ed:

    * 1.Coconut Willy:
    I'm off today so can't possibly have a bad day. Right?

    Hoooo luckyyyyy!

    * 2.Ynaku:
    Bwahahahahahah

    Tanx eh.

    LOL! N/P naks. Glad you enjoyed um!

    * 3.frankie:
    Lawl at the terrorist one!

    Yeah, that was my fave too frankies!

    * 4.che:
    About 3 or 4 months before I started a new job some of my co-workers told me that one of the partners who always worked late died in his offce overnight but they found him dead in his office the next morning.

    Yikes, that's kinda scary cheche!


  6. Kage:

    Thanks for the laughs this morning.


  7. rayboyjr:

    :D :D :D :D : D Good Morning Everyone!!! :D :D :D :D :D

    ... hey Ed ... the day is just a few hours old for me ... and not bad so far ... I let you know if it gets bad later, ok??? ... then you can add more stuff to cheer me up ... ;) ... 'cause I already read the stuff you posted ...

    ... it kind of reminds me ... of the World's Dumbest Criminals stuff they have on TV ... you think you've seen it all ... but there's always someone who takes stupidity to a new level ...

    ... haven't seen too much of the Olympics ... seems a little lackluster ... there's nothing that compels me to tune in ...

    ... but I have been watching ABDC ... esp. with the Hawaii crew ... but they've always been on the bottom so far ... they're not the best ... but should at least in the middle-of-the-pack ... Wassap Wit Dat!!! ... oops, wrong blog ...

    ... I think it's a big setup so far ... to allow the gimmick crews to advance ... I mean c'mon ... that robotic crew Poreotix has not done much dancing ... more like miming if you ask me ...

    ... Having a Good One Errrr-One!!! ...


  8. kuya.d:

    Curling ... I still don't completely understand it, but it looks like it would be fun to try. And the Russian women's team is very easy on the eyes .... =)


  9. Chicken Grease:

    I like the form of today's entry, Ed; really entertaining and unique.

    ALL of the stories made me laugh!

    I especially have enjoyed the U.S. gold situations w/this Winter Olympics. Can you believe Shaun White has his own practice area similar to the snowboard course he ran last week? Wow . . . that's ONE way to win (hey, Ed, when will YOU go for the gold???? ;) ).


  10. snow:

    i don't know about laughing... i did think "OMG!" a heck of a lot! dead at your desk for five days??? that is just gross! :shock:

    been watching the olympics a lot! the short track races with apolo ohno are always exciting - and controversial! i loved watching the women's downhill and men's snowboarding with lindsey vonn and shawn white leading the u.s. to gold! i don't understand curling either but have found it oddly appealing!


  11. Kel Sr.:

    Aloha Ed,

    Snowboarding, downhill, moguls, aerials, speed skating are great to watch, however, the crashes are so sad.

    Now I'm just waiting for the women's figure skating to begin tommorrow to see if USA, Japan or Korea will take the Gold. You know who I have to cheer for, right?

    Thanks for the laughs and do have a great week too!


  12. tita leerz:

    VHO7V! My frown is now upside down! aaahhh...good laughs.

    My fave winter olympic sport? what's dat one Apollo does? lol.....easy on the eyes.

    up until now, i've never paid attention to men's figure skating..but if russia's gonna get all catty, then.....MEYOW!

    @RBJ...ditto on the ABDC. whassup wid dat?! oh...sorry, ed.
    I think they did REALLY well on the first night at regionals but Heavy Impact is looking like the faves to win. Pore is fun to watch. Was nice to see them mix it up a little but. yeah...it is a set up. ....though i rather watch them than the dirty south. waaaaayyy too much booty...for me. LOL maybe i just switch over to the olympic station and find apollo or the men's figure skating.


  13. Rosette:

    i pick this Are Ya OK Now? - No?

    ha ha ha ...pigs escaping...you think the guy would hop on top of a pig instead of getting trampled..RODEO PIG! ..note to self don't hire stupid animal right defenders....


  14. Rosette:

    my stupid husband today..listen to this I was training my dog to "stay" so my dog wont bolt outside ..my dog always want to run away as soon as the door opens... then my husband keep yelling to shut the door I am letting out the warm air..it is winter here..so anyway I yell back I am training the dog!.. I was standing outside all of the sudden
    my husband shut the door in the middle of my dog training ...my dog confuse ..... ! I was watching Cesar Millan how to train a dog not to run outside....so..anyway..I was cursing what part don't you get I am training dog he slam shut the door.....oh...oh idiot! good way to train in winter becasue the dog will freeze outside if he runs away...summer I am not worried....so is that funny or you gonna slam the door on me too!


  15. uncle jimmy:

    yeah, good fun edward.. da lesson in mos' of da stories is that sometimes life just comes down to luck, good or bad.. it's not enough to be good, you have to be good an' lucky, too..

    speakin' of lucky, an' Winter Olym-pics, the kor-ee-ans need to shutup about their beefs wit' Ohno..eh, you guyz ken skate, but quit yer bitchin' or you're NEVER gonna get any endorsement money from anyone..

    feel obilgated to watch erryt'ing Olym-Pic since these guyz wen spend their whole life for this Kodak moment..

    try explain to 6 y.o. JJ, yeah it looks cool to be the fastest this or that, but are you ready to devote your erry waking minute to it for 10 years?

    umm, i don't think so Daddy..

    yeah, JJ, better to spend jus' 6 hours a day an' jus' be mediocre.. :lol:


  16. NeedaHobby:

    Not finding their co-worker for five days? That's just sad. That story about the seals was pretty shocking!

    I've been enjoying the short track speed skating with Apollo Ohno. Does anyone know when the relay will be on?

    Also, find curling interesting, although I still don't quite understand the scoring system. I like Michael Scott's (the Office) assessment ...

    http://www.twitvid.com/BF9E5


  17. hemajang:

    Those stories true? ...some were pretty sad to me and ironic.

    I actually in Seattle now but we drove up to Vancouver last week for some of the Olympic events. We went to 1000m qualifying men speedskating featuring Apolo Ohno and JR Celski, Canada vs. Swiss hockey (damn exciting), and Women Curling. A once-in-a-lifetime experience that we won't forget. I knew nothing about Curling and never was interested in hockey but seeing it live and being in an Olympic atmosphere were chicken skin stuff.


  18. M:

    Hello Ed

    I'm sick today and stayed home, it's a bad day. :(


  19. snow:

    hemajang - wow, i'm jealous - i've always wanted to go to the olympics! sounds like it was a great experience!


  20. World Wide Ed:

    * 6.Kage:
    Thanks for the laughs this morning.

    Hehe, n/p Kagz. Glad you enjoyed it! :)

    * 7.rayboyjr:
    ... but I have been watching ABDC ... esp. with the Hawaii crew ... but they've always been on the bottom so far ... they're not the best ... but should at least in the middle-of-the-pack ... Wassap Wit Dat!!! ... oops, wrong blog ...

    That's kuya.d's show right there. I've been meaning to watch it because of the Hawaii crew, but haven't gotten around to it yet. They reppin' it hard?

    * 8.kuya.d:
    Curling ... I still don't completely understand it, but it looks like it would be fun to try. And the Russian women's team is very easy on the eyes .... =)

    LOL! They should market that huh dewz? Get the fellas to all tune in and increase ratings! :P

    * 9.Chicken Grease:
    Can you believe Shaun White has his own practice area similar to the snowboard course he ran last week? Wow . . . that's ONE way to win (hey, Ed, when will YOU go for the gold???? ).

    LOL! I'm actually going boarding next month and am getting real antsy already. I wanna try the half pipe, but don't have enough balls. LOL! Gonna stick with jumps and the course kine stuffs. If they have a contest for eating it, I would win gold! :P Long time no see Ceeg!

    * 10.snow:
    the short track races with apolo ohno are always exciting - and controversial!

    I heard something about that. Him and the Korean team or something? What's da scoops Informer? :)

    * 11.Kel Sr.:
    Now I'm just waiting for the women's figure skating to begin tommorrow to see if USA, Japan or Korea will take the Gold. You know who I have to cheer for, right?

    Internally or externally? Hehe, nah, I know who you going root for Kel Sr. Have fun! :)

    * 12.tita leerz:
    My fave winter olympic sport? what's dat one Apollo does? lol.....easy on the eyes.

    Anyone else think he's da kine? 8)

    * 14.Rosette:
    my dog always want to run away as soon as the door opens...

    Now why could that be Rosey?

    * 15.uncle jimmy:
    speakin' of lucky, an' Winter Olym-pics, the kor-ee-ans need to shutup about their beefs wit' Ohno..eh, you guyz ken skate, but quit yer bitchin' or you're NEVER gonna get any endorsement money from anyone..

    I gotta read up on this controversy. Making me curious now ooj! :)

    * 16.NeedaHobby:
    Also, find curling interesting, although I still don't quite understand the scoring system. I like Michael Scott's (the Office) assessment ...

    http://www.twitvid.com/BF9E5

    Curdling! LOL!

    * 17.hemajang:
    I knew nothing about Curling and never was interested in hockey but seeing it live and being in an Olympic atmosphere were chicken skin stuff.

    Ho, lucky! I always wanted to do that hemmz. Ah, one day. Glad you had one good time though! Sounds like a once in a lifetime experience!

    * 18.M:
    I'm sick today and stayed home, it's a bad day.

    Awww. Hope you're feeling better today emmz! Get well!

    * 19.snow:
    hemajang - wow, i'm jealous - i've always wanted to go to the olympics! sounds like it was a great experience!

    Tru dat!


  21. snow:

    ed - my version of the scoops is that the koreans cheated! lol... really, i think they team skated against him but they are all salty because they screwed up and fell over themselves, allowing apolo to win the silver (in one race, anyway)! they still won the gold but they could have swept all three places. too bad, so sad... but, yay, for apolo!


  22. Rosette:

    well I was watching Dog Whisperer...I didn't train my dog not to bolt outside..! How was I suppose to know that! I am learning how to slowly train my stubborn crazy dog! Of all the dog I get a dog that is hard to train! SO far so good I am halfway learning how to train...my friend's dog ...so smart as can be..her dog does many tricks ..MY DOG..omg..stubborn....dominating dog...(MY FAULT my dog got my personality...they say dog are like the owner!)


  23. Rosette:

    give me a break this is my first time to really take care of a dog from a puppy stage.....I didn't know the dog even NIP....they BITE! well I been watching Cesar Millan and I try to train my dog...so far so good my dog tries to listen to me.//ypu should have seen my dog at en vet..the vet guy was nervous with my dog abotu to BITE HIM...my small fiesty dog


  24. Rosette:

    so I was watching Cesar Millan..oh no leash on his dog..I figure okay I let my dog out with no leash..my darn dog run away so fast! ...( I BLAME MY HUsBAnD l told my husbnad his fault the gate was open...lol...omg ! I have it all planned two gates for my dog...gosh darn dog run away so fast!


  25. Rosette:

    my husband said shih tzu ar very stubborn and high maintenance...would I listen!


  26. Rosette:

    my friend's dog is shih tzu mix with poodle so her dog is smart....my dog is a tiny fiesty guard dog..her dog wont bite..but my dog he will bite hard .....I warned the vet..the guy vet gave me this look OH I CAN HANDLE him until my dog turned evil with his fangs...omg ...so I am trying my best to keep my dog calm.


  27. HNL2LAS:

    I feel better now.. bahhaha thanks Ed!