Fave Five Friday - Man Rules
October 23rd, 2009
By World Wide Ed
By World Wide Ed
Before our softball game last weekend, the team circled up and did a prayer. One of our teammates asked one of the new guys if holding hands was ok, and somebody else replied with "Yeah, just don't interlock the fingers... Man Rule #3!". Ahahaha! I thought that was pretty classic!
So it got me thinking. What other "Man Rules" do we have floating around out there? You know, dem rules that are unwritten and unspoken, but very well known.
Here are a few off the top of my head (and here are some I actually found from a previous post). Feel free to use the comment area below to add your own! 
- Beer and Poke, it's what's for dinner.
- Boys don't cry.
- You are disowned if you don't know how to change your own oil or change a flat tire.
- Don't watch sissy shows like The Hills. Oops!
- Shaving/grooming should only be done around your mouth area.
- Man to man hugs should last no longer than 0.00001 seconds.
Any others out there? Feel free to be as creative as you can!
Shooots! Happy VHO7V Friday y'all! Have a great (UFC 104) weekend and I'll see ya next week!
World Wide Ed
October 23rd, 2009 at 5:06 am
I take exception to the grooming rule. My wife says a jungle belongs in the rain forest, not in my boxer shorts. One popular razor company actually markets male razors to shave the netherworld, or the end of the happy trail.
I know how to change the oil on my car. Take it to Jiffy Lube.
Boys can only cry at the birth of their child, or when Tiger looses a major championship to a no name Korean golfer.
October 23rd, 2009 at 5:52 am
Scott,
or at the end of Rudy or Old Yeller
if at all possible, and empty space should be left between you and a guy friend when sitting next to each other
October 23rd, 2009 at 6:01 am
...man drive manual shift...vraaa-vroooom!
October 23rd, 2009 at 6:32 am
@matt - yup, especially when the theatre is empty, each guy can have two seat gap or a row each. Personal space!
October 23rd, 2009 at 6:33 am
And at a public bathroom, leave at least one empty urinal between you and the next guy ... And eyes forward only!
October 23rd, 2009 at 6:36 am
VHO7V Friday! (<------- I should've patented that).
October 23rd, 2009 at 7:48 am
This reminds me of the Miller Lite "man law" commercials from a few football seasons ago! Some of my favorites were:
Male-male hugging: "If hugging a relative that you have not seen in a long time, two hands is appropriate. But if hugging anyone else, a hand shake with the other hand over their shoulder is more than enough."
A buddy sticking his finger in a beer bottle to bring back several to the table in one trip: "You poke it, you own it."
When toasting with beer bottles where to you clink bottles? "The Bottom, because clinking the top would swap saliva and thus qualify as kissing."
Watching sports: "You must always choose to root for a team."
Is it ok to put fruit in beer? " No! Don't Fruit the Beer."
Have a great weekend!
October 23rd, 2009 at 7:49 am
Ahahahaha! Manscaping, at its finest! Sweet.
OMG Rudy! OK, I was on the verge matty! Allllmost! Hehe!
Love the sound effect hemmaz!
Bwahahahahahaha! Maybe thaaaat's why they put the newspaper there now. No slip ups to make your eyes burn! Hehe!
LOLOLOL! OMG, that is soooo me knockers!
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:19 am
Just the joystick? ROFL!!!! Don't forget the little red button.
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:21 am
Boys don't cry but real men do.
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:22 am
@kuya...am told the "eyes forward only" rule also applies to a dorm full of guys watching porn.
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:24 am
@jkanas: you made my day! I love your #3!
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:27 am
No matter how dry your skin is, lotion is not necessary.
Well, um, unless...ha!
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:32 am
and, according the Bruddah Lance, there's no crying in softball.
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:32 am
but if your balls are hard then it's ok to cry.
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:33 am
No singing along to Miley Cyrus or Taylor Swift!
October 23rd, 2009 at 8:55 am
my sense is that if it's really a rule, then you don't actually have to say it out loud.. you just know..
October 23rd, 2009 at 11:32 am
I don't know if this holds true, but I don't think it's real manly to wrap your lips around the neck of a beer bottle while drinking. Coronas especially, since the neck is so long.
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:07 pm
Damn you Ed, did you tell @frankie I was a Taylor Swift fan?
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:09 pm
MANicures ... were never meant for men.
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:11 pm
@leerz - but what if you the only guy in the room with a bunch of wahines watching ... then your eyes cannot help but stray.
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:32 pm
... Howzit, Ed!!! ... man rules, huh!!! ... I should have a ton of these ... but sadly, my brain is cabbage today ...
... here's my one measly contribution ...
Whenever raising your glass/cup up to take a drink ... keep the damn pinky finger on the glass/cup ... no "fruity" pinky fingers pointing in the air, please ...
... Have a Good One Everyone!!! ...
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:57 pm
I've heard the "rules" matt and kuya mentioned about the personal space at the theaters and bathrooms.
I'm not a smoker myself, but I noticed that girls tend to hold their cigarettes between their index finger and middle finger. And guys with their thumb on the bottom and index finger on top.
Have a nice weekend everyone!
October 23rd, 2009 at 12:59 pm
Oh yeah! Classic!
Grrr...
Porn? What is porn?
Yucks!
Bwahahaha! Dammit!
Nah ooj. Some "men" need to be told. Haha!
Hahaha! Ewwww! I don't even wanna try and picture that Syxxy!
Hahaha! I guess you and I need to turn in our man cards dewz cause I like that Miley Cyrus song!
Word!
Woah, that's a cool bunch of chicks to watch that with you!
Ahahahahahahahaha! Dammit! That one strays on me sometimes when the handle is not big enough to fit all my fingers! LOL! Damn tea cups!
Could be a different kinda smoke for da second one Hobbz!
October 23rd, 2009 at 1:01 pm
@matt - what about Kramer vs Kramer, Joy Luck Club, or Million Dollar Baby?
October 23rd, 2009 at 1:50 pm
NaH,
might as well have asked about Steel Magnolias. if you saw these of your own volition you have to turn in the man card. the crying is irrelevant.
couple more that it's ok for a man to cry during: Field of Dreams (Dad, wanna have a catch?), Shane, Shawshank
October 23rd, 2009 at 3:50 pm
@Hobbz - Joy Luck pass ... it's a cultural flick, plus get Ming na!
October 23rd, 2009 at 3:52 pm
VHO7V Friday! (<------ should've put a patent on that!).
October 23rd, 2009 at 3:54 pm
@Ed - that roomful of chicas only exists in my dreams ...
October 23rd, 2009 at 9:21 pm
man to man hugs? What is that? Men aren't supposed to hug....never....ever.
changing the oil on my car? While I know how to do it, I ain't gonna do it. Despite having never been modified, my car is so low to the ground, the only way I could get under there, would be to dig an imu and hop into it while someone drives the car over the top of the imu. What happened to the good ole days where things were accessible, and you didn't need to completely disassemble your car just to change the oil?
October 23rd, 2009 at 9:23 pm
Boys don't cry, men don't cry.
October 23rd, 2009 at 9:39 pm
No guy will ever come across manly if he orders an "umbrella" drink.
October 24th, 2009 at 9:34 am
@ David In Oregon:
Boys don't cry, men don't cry....WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DON'T CRY.......I can make any man cry ....kick in the nuts will do that!
October 24th, 2009 at 9:34 am
NO MATTER if they are man THEY CRY LIKE BIG BABIES!
October 24th, 2009 at 9:35 am
yes if you know they button to make them cry they cry!
October 24th, 2009 at 9:38 am
yes SHUP UP YOUR CRYING wailing in my ears..i go deaf ...that is the real reason the boys stop cryingmom got tried of that high wailing tears ! SHUT UP ..omg!
October 24th, 2009 at 9:39 am
yes imagine a forty year old man his mother didn't tell him to shut up crying..omg!
October 24th, 2009 at 9:49 am
different country have different rules in Philippines guys can hold hands and wrap each other around..no problem..they are friends..
October 24th, 2009 at 9:50 am
yes so this guy from vietnam put his arms all around my husband my husband freak out..GO AWAY ! omg I laugh!
October 24th, 2009 at 11:20 am
I BE LIKE TEMPTED TO SCReaM SHUT UP YOUR CRYING....whack him with broom!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igB40C_0o68
October 24th, 2009 at 8:41 pm
I watched Transporter 3 yesterday. Got my testosterone flowing!
October 26th, 2009 at 9:08 pm
LOL! No ways, I remember you back in the day, you playa!
LOLOLOL! I was cracking up picturing what you wrote D.O.! Loved the way you called it an imu too! Hahahaha!
That's just wrong Rosey! Nuts are off limits! Hahaha!
*grunt*